Betusha Rapatusha

Poem from D* To me (An old muse)

'As her name leaves your lips

It dances with the breeze

A spirit like gold

Floating like autumn leaves

She's just like a river

Flowing with beauty

Both day and night

A heart of colours

That burns cosmically bright

A presence like the sun

So warming

Forever glowing

There is only one'

- D

This is possibly the most personal thing I'm about to share about myself. I always get asked who the guy in some of my paintings is.. long story short..

*sweating a bucket right now*...

This is a poem i got given a few weeks ago which was written about me from someone who once used to make my soul dance. When i met him i had graduated uni and i moved back home and didn't have many friends and no job and i was very very very depressed. id wake up in the morning wishing it was night time. I was not in a good place mentally at all. All i did was make art and lay in bed. The day we met i had just finished gym and i looked a mess!!! hair slick back, coconut oil on my hair and face and wearing XXXXL clothes (he couldn't see any of my lady lumps) we spoke for a few hours their and then just got on so well. Things then escalated so quick and we was speaking all the time and seeing each other and i just had butterflies all the time. I was glowing and he was glowing. He noticed everything about me.. i would say what my favourite books was and he would buy it to understand why i liked it so much, he made an effort with my friends, he would get me the most thoughtful gifts. He would get me books to read and every morning i would wake up with him trying to teach me something. He would do anything to make me smile. He would write poems about me. He was selfless- he wanted the best for me for me. He was my number one fan. He adored me.

Then things got more serious and he wanted to meet my family (which i said no- to me thats a massive thing) . Even though we got on amazing i knew that he wasn't for me. He was a lot older than me and when speaking about the future he said he never wants kids and married and his already traveled a lot and is not passionate about going traveling anymore. And a few other things happened which then things came to an end. A very bad end.

A few years later now.. Couple months ago he called me and we met up and spoke about everything. We both agree that maybe another life time we where soulmates .. but this lifetime we don't click like that and not for each other this life time. We are now really good friends. I appreciate him and he appreciates me but we are now just good friends.

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